A
Daily Prophet Exclusive
In
the latest in a run of bad luck for
Hogwarts
School
for Witchcraft and Wizardry, avian flu has
plunged the school into chaos.
Dozens
of students and at least 2 teachers have been admitted to St
Mungo’s Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries after their
fevers and severe chest colds did not respond to conventional
treatment.
Unconfirmed
reports suggest St Mungo healers are baffled about the disease,
which has already killed over 70 people in
Asia
. Apparently healers are even consulting with
Muggle doctors about how to combat the highly contagious illness.
The Ministry of Magic has refused to confirm these rumours.
Until
now the wizarding community has been untouched by the bird flu
panic sweeping the Muggle world.
Apparently
the epidemic at Hogwarts stems from close contact between students
and post owls, particularly during morning periods when mail is
delivered in the
G
reat Hall while students are breakfasting.
Madam
Pomfrey, Hogwarts hospital wing matron, comments, ‘I’ve always
been worried about droppings and feathers mixing with the kippers
and scrambled eggs. I’m actually surprised we haven’t had any
problems before now’.
Hogwarts
acting headmistress Minerva Mc
G
onagall provided the Daily Prophet with the
following brief statement, ‘We are of course doing what we can
for sick students and staff. Lessons are however continuing as
normal, wherever possible. It is what Albus Dumbledore would have
wanted.’
The
avian flu is the latest in a series of catastrophes at Hogwarts.
The disasters culminated earlier this year with a Death Eater
attack on the school grounds. Popular headmaster Albus Dumbledore,
former chairman of the International Confederation of Wizards, was
killed in the struggle.
There
are concerns that Hogwarts will now be closed indefinitely. Many
parents are not waiting for an announcement.
Says
one concerned Hogwarts parent, ‘First the return of You-Know-Who
and now this? I’m in the process of transferring my daughter to
Beauxbatons where I’m sure she’ll be safer. The food will be
awful there, but Cassandra will have to learn to stomach pale
blancmange’.
Meanwhile,
the wizarding community of
G
reat Britain
is now bracing itself for further cases of
avian flu. Despite protests from breeders, the Scottish Hippogriff
population has been quarantined as precautionary measure.
There
was mild panic in Diagon Alley recently when a phoenix, imported
from
G
reece
, was spotted coughing and sneezing. The
Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures
swiftly intervened.
As
it turned out, the phoenix had only been exposed to Pepper-up
Potion, and has been returned to its owner.
